In the mind of James (Excerpt from a story I am working on)

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I never asked for any of this.

Never asked for the sleepless nights, the tough mornings.

Never asked for the isolation, the loneliness.

I never gave up on myself to be bitter.

To be fearful.

Where has the time gone?

It goes quickly when your hiding.

The times I told you I’d be there for you. I meant them.

But now those are just faint words in the distance.

Echoing behind me, reminding me of the past that hurts more than the present.

Remembering the moments I stayed strong.

But now? Now I am as weak as an infant.

Holding on to myself, crawling to places because I just don’t have the energy anymore.

My friend, the bottle.

My hiding spot, my home.

Made the mistake of letting you go…